Kappa Kappa Eat My Pie

This is an open letter the universe:


Dearest Universe,
You fucking suck! I originally wanted to call you a big stupid head but thought the latter was a stronger way to get your attention. Now, back to you sucking. You make me believe everything is okay. You wait until I`m happy and I don`t see you coming. You wait until I expect that my life is changing and that for once I`m coming out the winner. Then you sit back, grab an ice cold beer, and make me suffer. And it amuses you. In fact, it amuses your friends and family that you invite over to watch me in pain. First you gave her doubts, which made her distant. Then you made her cheat but I fucked you over cause I forgave her. Then you convinced her to break up with me but kept the love there so I couldn't live without her. And last but not least you took her away so I would love her more then anything but not have her to touch or kiss. Thanks a lot fucktard! Its appreciated. What more would you like. I`m alone, miserable and seriously in need of hitting something. Every little joy I have concerning her, you take away. You won`t be happy until I hate her and am totally alone. Then you`ll let me think I have some self worth, slowly so I don`t get too cocky, maybe give her back to me and start the waiting game all over again.
So here`s what I am going to do. I`m not giving up on her. I`m going to fight. I`m not throwing in the towel and I`m going to get her back. So fucking you, you bastard. This is war and I`m going to win. You couldn't`t possibly do more to me then you already have. Bring it on!

Sincerely,

Cory

p.s kiss my ass

When I was a boy...

I`m taking advantage of a slow day here at visa to bring you our regularly scheduled programing of boi fun. I know you all love me, face it, I`m irresistible.
So I am sitting here, well dressed, because when I feel like crap I dress well. So seeing me in a suit and tie is indicative of me not sleeping well or having had a a fight with *My Love.* Now you know a little bit more about my weird twisted self, now you`ll sleep better.
I feel like shit. But I dont feel the need to rant to you today. (please stop cheering.) I dont know really what to say today. I don't feel like doing anything, let alone selling cards and services to people who just want their balance. I`m a customer service agent. I`m here to smile and help. And as fate would have it I have no desire to help.
So if you see me walking down the street, give me a hug or a pat on the back. I dont get either of them and wouldn't mind the appreciation.
Peace out!

Billy

American Idol sucks...

Its a quiet Wednesday night and I have nothing to do but subject myself to American idol. Nothing seems right anymore. The apartment is empty, nothing smells, tastes or feels right to me. I don't care about the dishes or even remotely making this place livable. All I do is live in a haze and try and make it to the next day where I can work and forget everything out of my 8x10 box. I don't want to come home. I don't want to eat. She is all I think about, she is my everything and I wont feel whole again until she is back in my arms again. I miss you baby...